Santa Claus

And then It was Us...

Santa Claus

And then It was Us...

Lonesome Camel

  The lonesome camel

 

 

There was a need of being alone in me. And the most wanted place was  a desert. To feel its hot, hot weather. To let its wind dance its sands under my feet, to not to feel hungry or thirsty, to not to need somebody.

But the need was to be alone in the shape of an animal. And me, I was a camel, a lonesome camel having a chance to be deserted, maybe a one who likes its loneliness or is accustomed to loneliness.

I didn’t want to be hungry. I didn’t want to eat or drink for 6 days. It was my imagine to show that even by my imagination I wont feel hungry in my life. But first I HAD TO fill myself for the days.

But I was in my desert and I had nothing, but every thing (water and food) in my only cactus. But I will just take enough morsels of my cactus to stay alive.

But I hadn’t to stay alive. It wasn’t my plan. I needed to not to eat for 6 days.

So I had to eat the cactus completely. I had to eat the cactus completely, so I started it although I didn’t want to. I start from the top.

Now I was in the middle.

My heart was aching of what I didn’t want to eat. But I had to eat. I had to eat, to stay alive for the days.

Now I was in the bottom of my cactus. My sweet cactus which was just mine and I loved it once. But I was at its bottom, eating it completely to stay alive for the six days.

But why I wanted to stay alive now that I had eaten my beloved cactus? I may now stay alive for the six days, but I will die in the 7th day.

 

Good bye

 

M. Kamkar

87/11/29

00.47

نظرات 4 + ارسال نظر
Devl's advocate شنبه 24 اسفند‌ماه سال 1387 ساعت 10:41 http://my21.blogfa.com

تنهایی! تو که می خوری مرا و چونان کویری تشنه در من جاری هستی... عمرم را می کاهی و چونان شتری بر پشت من سنگینی می کنی،تو که من شده ام آب و نانت... من تو را زندگی می کنم ,و تو هرگز نمی فهمی که چرا من بی-آب-ان نمی شوم... .

سلام
موفق باشی!

مسعود آبادی یکشنبه 25 اسفند‌ماه سال 1387 ساعت 10:23 http://www.entrance86.blogfa.com

Dear Milad,
I found your story quite nice, and to be honest, full of subtleties. You did point to a very vivid feature of human-like life in the form of that of an animal; we human beings have to sacrifice lots of our beloved to live on. It’s a bitter fact, but reality is what we are doomed to accept unquestionably.
I also suppose this story had its roots in your experiences throughout your life. Maybe you put up with loosing what you had wanted for a long.
Your use of numbers should have things behind, but I couldn’t realize.
There I found great imagery as the story moves on; simple but full of words to say.

Your story was a real short one and I found it a bit unusual to have such rather long sentences; the reader has to restart the sentence to get it properly.
And there also were some small grammatical considerations that I think could be better structured.

And my last word to you my very friend. We all have some pains in our hearts that are likely to erupt soon; willy-nilly, we devour lots of them to live on. We have our cries, our passions, our shouts, as part of our life. Then simply eat them up just for the reason that we love our life. Part of life for the existence of the rest!

However, I do believe in your magic pen and hope no one, no one will disappoint you in your way towards your goal.

Masoud Abadi
2009-03-15

Iman Kiaee یکشنبه 25 اسفند‌ماه سال 1387 ساعت 12:55 http://www.entrance86.blogfa.com

نـالـه از درد مکن / آتشی را کـه در آن زیسته ای سـرد مکن /با غمش باز بمان /سرخ رو باش از این عشق و سر افراز بمان

Dear Milad
Honestly, I couldn’t understand your story at the first time. But when I read more, I got it. I know that this story is originated from your pains. There are some times in the life that you have to give up your desired thing for the sake of something that is of greater value or importance, but I am sure that there is wisdom behind it by GOD. And sure enough, GOD never leaves you out. So, trust in GOD and never feel left out, because sooner or later you will understand the wisdom behind your pains. I tell it from my own experience.

دل آدم خیلی چیزها رو می خواد ... اما نمیشه همیشه همه چیز و بهش داد ... حتی اگه از طرفش تهدید به شکستن شدی باز هم همان قانون پا بر جا ست ...





marjan دوشنبه 29 شهریور‌ماه سال 1389 ساعت 14:27

i've enjoyed it alot and the use of symbols made the story so rich and impressive..

.but i won't eat my cactus just for being alive...i donit let it die even if i die....i will eat my soal just for it to stay alive and fresh.

keep up your great work

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